_____________________
Saturday, April 30, 2005 ; 10:20 AM
love.my bestfriend is having a really shakey relationship with her bf now, and girl you're strong and you can make it through if you tell yourself so. it made me think back and stuff, and i guess i've never really loved anyone (other than family and friends) before. people often take the word "love" for granted, saying 'i love you' just for the sake of saying it. but when it comes down to the real test, who actually mean what they say? in so many relationships, give and take, 'i love you's, 'i wanna spend my whole life with you's, 'you are my one and only's, and little gifts.. are these acts a prove of their love? not really. after our mate initiates an end to the relationship reason being he/she loves someone else and is prolly happily with another partner, many of us would start to dislike them and claim that they are such big flirts and are stupid to have left for someone else, and we would prolly try to fight to get them back.
but the truth is, if you love the person, you'd be happy just seeing him/her happy. you'd do anything and give up everything just to see them smile. and seriously, i've never been there before. so guys out there, love comes with big sacrifices. if it's one sided and you really love them, find a way to let them go. and trust me, love will find its way back to you.
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
_____________________
Friday, April 29, 2005 ; 9:52 PM
ran 2.3km at bishan gym just now. feel so satisfied. weee.
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
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Thursday, April 28, 2005 ; 8:15 PM
i could die of heat stroke anytime soon if this weather stays on. not only is it hot but also humid! anyways the
someone isn't gonna continue working at that workplace anymore. and, i shouldn't really bother that much actually. hah.
dear boy,
i heard your name the other day ;
and i started reminiscing on how good it could have been ;
i thought i've moved on and gotten over you ;
but honestly i've been going through shit ;
cus i miss your face i can't deny ;
life's a drag when you're not by my side ;
it'll be hard for me to get over you ;
just give me time, and i hope i do ;
i often question my foolishness ;
i often lie in bed wondering what wrong i've done ;
why do i love you when you toyed my feelings for fun ;
i want so dearly to ask you if you think of me too ;
but somehow i don't want to know the answer ;
i hope you're happy now with your life now ;
though i'm struggling with mine ;
i wish one day you'd finally see ;
that the one who's been right by you was me ;
yours truly,
the one who's never let you go :(
i will go the distance, i will go the miles
that's how much you mean to me
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
_____________________
Wednesday, April 27, 2005 ; 7:59 PM
somebody just told me she saw
someone. i can't reveal who that somebody and
someone are cus the somebody may be reading my blog. complicating! anyways, i wanna go THERE to see the
someone NOW! it's been like how long since we last met. sigh sigh. memories memories, vivid ones. the somebody told me that her friend said that
someone is good looking. woo. i wanna see
someone now, NOW!! i miss
someone.
anyways, studied at bishan cc again today. it wasn't exactly productive cus my head was aching and i caught a few winks. that's all i guess. my phone is spoilt. it just shut down on me when i was listening to the recording of my own piano piece 'to zarnakand'. rahh! :( but nevermind, mag's nice to lend me her extra 6610. new phone pls! plan's not ended, so no offer. boo. and i so wanna get a second hand nokia 6100! it's outdated, but it's super slim and sleek please!
little
someones and
china birds in the sky.
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
_____________________
Sunday, April 24, 2005 ; 9:28 PM
i screwed up my chinese prelim oral! ah well. why am i not surprised.. hah. my group had ms chia as the tester, and it so have to happen that she was in a friggin bad mood that morning. :(
went to novena in the afternoon with jaslyn and went town shopping after that. i bought a watch that cost 10 bucks only outside far east which looks a lil like a fossil watch. hoho. and it's white! :D oh yeah. i wanna get that pair of shades from topshop! wahha very act la but darn nice. :D yes yes i will geddit. after shopping we went back to novena to eat prawn mee! yay. my favourite.
i wanna do it all over again, with you.
yes i wanna feel how i felt for you.
it was was only for a night. :( today, tomorrow, and the days after, it's gonna be the same over again.
I'M ALWAYS STUCK WITH THESE EMOTIONS, AND THE MORE I TRY TO FEEL, THE LESS I'M WHOLE. MY TEARS ARE TURNING INTO TIME, I'M WASTING TRYING TO FIND A REASON FOR GOODBYE ;
TELL ME THAT IT'S OVER. AND I'LL BE THE FIRST TO GO ;replies.
jaslyn: yay.. yes yes. gym!
glynis: ahha. mug? i hearing wrongly? haha. jk. thats good!
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
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Friday, April 22, 2005 ; 9:53 PM
eee. i don't like my template now. cliche cliche.. anyways i gotta run so i'll have a quick update, and i'll make changes to the template another time. our class played the bees prank on ms adeline ng. she not fun one, refused to believe there were bees. haha. either that or ms yang already warned her bout us. studied with manda at gardens cc today. i didn't know the cc was so nice in the inside. hoho. TMR'S MT ORAL PRELIMS. if i screw this up i'll have disadvantage cus i really wanna go to a jc during first 3 months! ahhh.
i came across your picture, and
all the feelings i once felt for you came rushing back to me. i still miss you very much. :(
dear boy,
I woke up in the middle of the night ;
and I noticed my guy wasn't by my side ;
could have sworn I was dreamin for him ;
I was feenin, so I hadda take a little ride ;
backtracking ova these few years ;
tryna figure out wat I do to make it go bad ;
cus ever since my boy left me ;
my whole left life came crashin ;
and i'm so lonely ;
Can't belive I had a guy like you ;
and I just let you walk right outta my life ;
after all I put you through ;
you still stuck around and stayed by my side ;
what really hurt me is I broke ur heart ;
baby you were a good guy and I had no right ;
I really wanna make things right ;
cus without u in my life ;
boy i'm so lonely ;
Been all about the world ;
ain't neva met a guy that can take the things that you been through ;
Never thought the day would come ;
where you would get up and run and I would be out chasing you ;
Cus ain't nowhere in the globe i'd rather be ;
ain't no one in the globe i'd rather see ;
than the boy of my dreams that
made me be
so happy but now so lonely ;
replies soon! gotta run.
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
_____________________
Thursday, April 21, 2005 ; 8:23 PM
class is fun these days. there's been bees around the school lately and our class has been trying to trick teachers into believing that there's bees when there aren't by humming the sound of bees buzzing. haha. ms yang's reaction was funny. today we played a practical joke on mr tan! when he went down to the staffroom to get some stuff, the whole class switched off the lights and ran over to mr chan's room to hide. mr tan came up and found us missing, and he just walked past mr chan's class looking oh-so blur. darn lame lah. wahah.
after school jaslyn and i went to hougang gym! i feel so satisfied again. :) stupid malcolm cancelled tuition today 3 hours before tuition saying he has some lawyer nonsense. pfft. so we worked out in the gym for around an hour to 2 hours. heh. we went back to my house and were practically limping our way up the stairs. drama!
replies.
glynis: hawhaw. honoured of course. yay.
jaslyn: hi mamahead! :) GYMMM!
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
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Wednesday, April 20, 2005 ; 9:01 PM
PFT today! arggghh i MISSED by gold because of my standing broad jump AGAIN, just like last year! :( how irritating. i can't jump far for nuts. hahaha.
yesterday jaslyn and i went j8 to mug, and ate oreo cheesecake at coffeebean. darn nice please. weeee! then we went ta bishan gym to work out and i felt so satisfied after that. hoho! :) anyways, school's as usual these few days. i've a new shell behind me, by the way, who's none other than toii the moofoo.
okay gotta mug now. MT OLEVELS ARE COMING! :(
i wish i could tell you i'm feeling better everyday ;
that it didn't hurt when you walked away ;
but to tell you the truth i can't find my way ;
replies.
cheryl: ahha nevermind. i look like crap too in there please! :D nono, you date me la! i need to mug anyways. mug with me la.
glynis: alrighty. :)
toii: toitoitoitoi i mish eux oso worxxx! shwmuuaaackkkkxxx worxx..
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
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Sunday, April 17, 2005 ; 12:50 PM
2.4km run yesterday morn! it turned out pretty fine. was supposed to go novena church with jaslyn in the afternoon but i overslept! boohoo. anyways, gonna go gardens to mug today. no time to slack alr luhhh.
I watched the walls around me crumble ;
But its not like that will build em up again ;
So here your last change for redemption ;
So take it while it lasts because it will end ;
And my tears are turning into time
I've wasted trying to find a reason for goodbye ;
I cant live without you ;
Can't breathe without you ;
I dream about you honestly ;
Tell me that its over ;
Because the world is spinning and I'm still living ;
It wont be right if were not in it together ;
Tell me that it's over ;
And i'll be the first to go ;
Don't want to be the last to know ;
Don't want to be the one to chase you ;
But at the same time your the hart that I call home ;
I'm always stuck with these emotions ;
And the more I try to feel the less I'm whole ;
My tears are turning into time ;
I've wasted trying to find a reason for goodbye ;
replies.
glynis: ahah okok.. we'll go out soon! after my chinese.
kathy: heyyy. okay. add me on your msn and i'll recommend you good songs. hoho.
peishan: always been fine. haha. hope you're doing fine too!
adeline: hullo hullo burger!!
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
_____________________
Thursday, April 14, 2005 ; 8:57 PM
mr tan and chan were so nice to treat us to pizzahut's hawaiian pizza today together with pepsi during CD period as a reward for our class getting 1st for class event during swimming carnival. heh heh. what sheer bliss. we got credit for their victory. weee.. it was mr chan's birthday too so we sang him a bday song. lol. he wanted to kill mag for slipping her tongue to tell the class.
anyways, badminton interhouse after school. the match ended only at 4.30, and my tuition was supposed to start at 4.30! so me and jaslyn rushed off right immediately and got a cab.. reached home only by 5 and found malcolm already waiting. tiring la. run here and there. tmr's another hectic day after sch. cca, then repainting homeroom, then rush home, change and rush to town to meet family for dinner and movie. and saturday morning there's 2.4km.
/Girl I tried to give u everything ;
Can't believe the ways u repaid me ;
Girl u had it all ;
But I guess my all wasn't good enough for you ;
Baby I've accepted it ;
And I aint gone trip ;
Girl im movin on ;
Sometimes I cant help but think that another man's gonna get the one I made for me ;
replies.
glynis: in your blog!
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
_____________________d
Wednesday, April 13, 2005 ; 7:03 PM
I toss and turn in bed
Can't get you out of my head
Even though you're so far away
I need you here with me
Oh boy, why can't you see
That I can't live without your love
When I close my eyes I think of you
Well I wish I had you here with me
But there's nothing I can do
Counting every day that goes by
And the tears that I cry
You don't wanna love me no more
Wish that you could hold me tonight
I'm hurting inside
Cause you don't wanna love me
Love me no more
I tried to call your phone
But you ain't been at home
I need to find out where you are
So I can make you see that you belong with me
For me there is no other love
When I close my eyes I think of you
I wish I had you here with me
But there's nothing I can do
All I know is that I can't live without you
But I wanna know what made you feel this way?
I'll be right here for you and everything that you do
But how can I get close to you
when you don't feel the way I do?
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
_____________________
Tuesday, April 12, 2005 ; 8:11 PM
i just heard a loud BANG from the sky. it totally freaked me out i swear. it was so LOUD it scared my whole family. wowweee. :( and even the whole computer screen was unstable during that moment and my msn signed out by itself. yikes.
went with bestfriend to town today.. she wanted to get her ear rings but ended up not getting any.. hah. supposed to meet my niece (who's older than me) at j8 and only to find out she was unable to meet me when i reached j8, and sent the stuffs she wanted to pass me this evening. greatt. but unable for some personal reasons la. so okayyyy..
life's sucha draaagggg.. i'm so waiting for the Os to end, but it seems like never. roar! :( aiyayeee.
Broken this fragile thing now ;
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces ;
And I've thrown my words all around ;
But I can't, I can't give you a reason ;
I feel so broken up and I give up ;
I just want to tell you so you know ;
Here I go, scream my lungs out ;
and try to get to you ;
You are my only one ;
I let go, there's just no one ;
that gets me like you do ;
You are my only, my only one ;
Made my mistakes, let you down ;
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long ;
Ran my whole life in the ground ;
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone ;
And something's breaking up, I feel like giving up ;
I won't walk out until you know ;
Here I go so dishonestly ;
Leave a note for you my only one ;
And I know you can see right through me ;
So let me go and you will find someone ;
replies.
cheryl: yeah. i only went to see the invitational relays but they only invited primary schools! boo. :( hoho yah. true.
glynis: yes! who's fault ah. tskk.
ade: haha yeah.. stop denying la.. once from IMH still wanna deny. lol
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
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Monday, April 11, 2005 ; 9:30 PM
Something ugly this way comes ;
Through my fingers sliding inside ;
All these blessings all these burns ;
I'm godless underneath your cover ;
Search for pleasure search for pain ;
In this world now I am undying ;
I unfurl my flag my nation helpless ;
Black black heart why would you offer more ;
Why would you make it easier on me to satisfy ;
I'm on fire I'm rotting to the core ;
I'm eating all your kings and queens ;
All your sex and your diamonds ;
As I begin to lose my grip ;
On these realities your sending ;
Taste your mind and taste your sex ;
I'm naked underneath your cover ;
Covers lie and we will bend and borrow ;
With the coming sign ;
The tide will take the sea will rise and time will rape ;
Black black heart why would you offer more ;
Why would you make it easier on me to satisfy ;
I'm on fire I'm rotting to the core ;
I'm eating all your kings and queens ;
All your sex and your diamonds ;
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
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Saturday, April 09, 2005 ; 8:29 PM
ah ah. there's so many flies in the house now. :( i think it's the weather. my dad and mom's resorted to switching off all the lights in the house to chase them away in the meantime.
swim meet at yck ytd. it turned out fine. the weather was hot la. :( after swim meet xj and i actually planned to go jln kayu to have roti prata.. but we changed plans and went to j8 to eat instead. zelly came along. finally after 3 months bestfriend and i went out again. xj went home after that and we went town to get stuffs..
badminton interhouse today. lost in doubles won in singles. lalala. judging from my opponents it's quite predictable. hah. yay. st eli got 2nd but i dont know how cus i remembered the house winning only 2 out of 5 sets. :S hoho.
replies.
glynis: thanks! you take care too.
ade: hur. some guys cant get into my url cus there's a "-" infront. :( nono. see. symptoms back. it's MENTAL not METAL. haha. not recovered yet aye.
germaine: haha okay i'll help if i can. yeah i will! thanks! :D
cheryl: nooo. it's from gettyimages. hahaha.
chris: yes she's like on the verge of being anorexic already lah. so worrying. and anorexic is uncool. :( she's being so paranoid over everything she eats.
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
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Monday, April 04, 2005 ; 10:18 PM
alas! i stepped outta my house for tuition after 5 full days stoning at home. haha. it wasn't that bad after all. i just glued my eyes on the comp and the tv.. woo. lalala. i'm so sick of my template. i get sick of them quick, if anyone realises.. hoho. i was looking through my list of songs and decided to put up some old ones.. mandy moore's cry! i love that song. the ost for a walk to remember.. i remember how the movie used to make me tear and all. ah! damn touching.
tuition today. while walking to the centre we saw a dead bird on the grass and jaslyn screamed her lungs out like "aghhh! aggghhhh!! aggghhhhh!!!" as if she was being raped or something! everyone at the opposite coffeeshop turned and stared at her la. it wasn't cos she was scared by the bird but because of what state the bird was in. ahh. she screams over everything la. roflol..
ayee. it's PTM tmr! YIKES. imagine what mr tan will say about me to my mom, all the number of exercises i haven't passed up to him. woops. and mr chan, he'll tell my mom how enthu i get when it comes to that really interesting topic in biology. lol..
aiyaar. okay i've nothing else to blog about. blogging's getting really boring these days. maybe it's just my life. ha.
replies.
ade: haha, so i assume you think alot. tsk. how was IMH? good?
guriy: heya. haha yeah, i made it myself. just modify the pictures and do my own layout. :)
cheryl: haha, i've cooled down alreadyy. loves.
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
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Sunday, April 03, 2005 ; 4:31 PM
apparently everyone's in a rotten mood now, including myself. ARRGHHH. i hate you!!! go away! i swear i don't even wanna hear about you, not even your stinking name! yucks. you gross me out, totally.
I heard you're doing okay ;
But I want you to know I'm addicted to you ;
I can't pretend I don't care ;
When you don't think about me ;
Do you think I deserve this? ;
I tried to make you happy but you left anyway ;
I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you ;
But I want it and I need it ;
I'm addicted to you ;
Now it's over, can't forget what you said ;
And I never wanna do this again ;
Heartbreaker!
i bought a ticket to the end of the rainbow ;
watch the stars crash in the sea ;
if i could ask God just one question ;
why aren't you here with me, tonight?.. ;replies.
kim: yah.. thanks. :) forget it man. i don't want the book anymore. for some reasons.. i guess you'll know why.
joleen: haha. yeah i will. hah. he assumes that okay. even when the doc said i didn't get it cus of that. -.- lamme..
sham: thanks. :)
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y
_____________________I don't wanna lose you,
Friday, April 01, 2005 ; 6:40 PM
HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY! okay okay. i'm so bored at home! i'm having more ulcers! now i have one right on my tonsil. youch. :( other than that, i feel perfectly normal. been glued to the comp and tv the whole day.. how boring. oh yeah, thanks to everyone who has shown concern about my so-called disease! it's not serious, and i'm finee! :) i just can't go back just as yet cus i'm contagious. :/ lalala. yay. i've a craving for guava and mom's back with it! tata.
I don't wanna lose you, I don't wanna use you ;
just to have somebody by my side ;
And I don't wanna hate you, I don't wanna take you ;
But I don't wanna be the one to cry ;
That don't really matter to anyone, anymore ;
But like a fool I keep losing my place ;
And I keep seeing you walk through that door ;
But there's a danger in loving somebody too much ;
And it's sad when you know it's your heart you can't trust ;
There's a reason why people don't stay where they are ;
Baby sometimes love just ain't enough ;
Now I could never change you, I don't wanna blame you ;
Baby you don't have to take the fall ;
Yes I may have hurt you, but I did not desert you ;
Maybe I just wanna have it all ;
It makes a sound like thunder, it makes me feel like rain ;
And like a fool who will never see the truth ;
I keep thinking something's gonna change ;
I'm taking my time ;
I'm trying to leave the memories of you behind ;
I'm gonna be fine ;
As soon as I get your picture right out of my mind ;
I wanna feel the way you make me feel when I'm with you ;
I wanna be the only hand, you need to hold on to ;
But everytime I call you don't have time ;
I guess I'll never get to call you mine ;
replies.
bestfriend: thanks. i will! :)
toii: ahah, you seem fine til now so okay lah.
ade: ade is CHEM PRO and SIAsuits-phobic. haha.
xoxo -
Y Y Y Y Y